Each week comedian Ross Patterson shares his wildly unique views on pop culture, entertainment, and sports as he’s joined by the world’s worst producer Jessie Wiseman. She’s easy on the eyes, but terrible on Google.
Ross’s new book ‘As the Sun Rises, It Dawns on Him’ for a few weeks (out now) because it’s too naughty, they dump on Apple for pretending they invented regular headphones with their new AirPods Max, talk about going to see Dave Chappelle and Joe Rogan tonight but having to get a nose swab to do it, and how Michigan has officially surrendered to Ohio State.
Ross and Jessie break down the media’s reaction to Trump’s 46 minute election tirade and how the news “covered” it, they take a dump on Austin mayor Steve Adler for telling people to say home while he was in Cabo, Jessie’s Crime Corner features a violent, masturbating Floridian — PLUS, did Jessie microdose Ross’s coffee this morning?
Ross and Jessie break down how thoroughly parenting during a pandemic sucks balls, Jessie encourages Ross to get a dark bodybuilder spray tan, Ross wonders why everyone in the world isn’t ready to murder China over COVID, and why Austin has the nicest drug dealers.
Ross and Jessie rap about Thanksgiving and tell you why there will be heavy drinking this year, chat about the death of Maradona and his love of cocaine, why you don't want to die the day before Thanksgiving, and why Dave Chappelle rant about boycotting his show makes zero sense at all.
Ross and Jessie discuss the weird return of Randy Quaid, Drew Barrymore's talk show segment gone wrong where she married a High School teacher and student, the void left by Trump in the media, we review the Reagans and John Belushi documentaries on Showtime, what Melania should do with the last Christmas at the White House, and the new migrane drugs that Khloe Kardashian is peddling.
Ross and Jessie discuss the new Sara Paulson holiday movie where actresses faked being in a wheelchair during auditions to play her daughter, John Lennon's autographed album to Mark David Chapman hours before he murdered him is up for sale, the serial killer ornaments that are available for sale on Etsy, and why Ross won't buy Jessie a brickoven pizza maker.
Ross and Jessie discuss the allegations against the SoulCycle instructors that are shaming people in class and why Ross agrees with them, why Bobby Brown would have the most depressing "Behind The Music" ever, why everyone is surfing on Zillow during the pandemic, and Jables is back with an all new "Crime Corner!"
Ross and Jessie discuss Post Malone stealing Ross' tv show, getting stung by a bee while doing a live tv interview, why your child probably won't play professional sports, Jessie's sweet softball days as a catcher, the Da Vinci drawing of Jesus that could fetch $135 million, and why Aunt Becky's husband had a dramatic makeover for prison.
Ross and Jessie discuss Mardi Gras being shut down and more than likely SWSX in Austin, the Bass Pro Shops commercial featuring a Santa behind plexiglass with a plastic face shield on that looks frightening for children, why people are raging that Baby Yoda ate an egg, the new Kevin Hart stand up special dropping on Netflix tonight, and why Ross hates Bill Gates.
Ross and Jessie discuss Ross' championship as the head coach for his son's 6 year old soccer team, Harry Styles wearing a dress on the cover of Vogue, why Ross would have been fine with checking out after the Super Bowl this year, the new SpaceX launch where the astronauts all showed up in a Tesla to the launch pad, and why Melania is pissed to have to do one last Christmas at the White House.
